Confession

20^th December – at last it was the day I was waiting for - finally I was going home after one and half years. I was happy- probably one of the happiest person on earth- I longed to see my folks for a looong time. The shuttle dropped me off at the St. Louis airport from where I had to take a connecting flight to New York. It cost me $50 for the luggage- never mind I was too happy to bother about $50. In JKF Airport I had a hard time finding my luggage – had to wait for almost 2 and half hours and the finally got it !

Literally I was running from Concourse C to Concourse E – oh God ! I don’t want to miss my flight. After security checking and much hustle bustle, finally I reached Gate 8A and guess what ??? My flight was delayed for almost 3 hours ! ophhh ! At least better than missing a flight . I was soooppper hungry- so went to grab a sandwich at the nearest restaurant.

“ How can I help you Madam?”

“Can I have a chicken sandwich please? “

“Sure, your order number 215 will be right here. Order no 212 is ready .”

“Its mine” – someone said …I know this voice – turned around.Yes…it was him ! OMG ! it was Jitda- my undergraduate college senior.

“Jitda??” I asked .

“Tapashree !!!! Kemon achhis??? What are you doing here?? Where have you been so many years??? “

“Easy, easy Jitda- one question at a time- are you in a hurry? I mean when is your flight? “

“It’s in 2 hours.”

“Let’s sit together and have lunch…I will grab my chicken sandwich .”

….. The next few hours were …well what you call “nostalgia unlimited”. Jitda and me- we went to the same undergraduate engineering college in Haldia, West Bengal. He was one of the lead singers and guitarist in one of the most popular college bands. I, like hundreds of juniors, was a die-hard fan of their band.

“Do you still sing Jitda? “ I asked.

“Of course I do ! What do think…software engineers don’t have hobbies?”

“I never said that ! You know what? Few days ago I was listening to the youtube video of your last band performance .”

“Trust me…those were the best days” – Jitda said .

“I swear ! I miss the hostel days- friends, chaos in canteen, tasteless chicken, overnight adda sessions, Fresher’s , Fest …” I was back to my college days again.

“Fresher’s welcome…that reminds me, Tapashree do you remember how we ragged you?”

“Yes Sir ! How can I ever forget that? What was that weird extempore? Ya , I remember .

Chandni raat haathoon mein haath

Peechhe se aaya baap ka laath."

…We were laughing our hearts out. I guess few things are priceless…and that’s what makes us nostalgic .

“I had to tell you something about our last college fest (Riviera)…you remember the solo music competition during Riviera? “ Jitda suddenly interrupted my thoughts !

“You mean the one where you sang – Mora Saiyyan mose bolena…you rocked Jitda…no doubt you won the first prize…I stood fourth though…your awesome support in guitar were in vain .”

“Tapashree, if you remember, I stopped strumming after the first Antara of your song for which you missed few beats as well.”

“Ya, but that happens Jitda…its ok…don’t feel bad about it.”

“No…” he paused, “ I did that purposely”

“What !!! “ I was shocked .

“Sorry re, actually I should n’t have done that…but that was my last college fest…I wanted to win anyhow.”

“But, how can YOU do this brother? Do you know…we used to consider you as our college superstar.”

“Sorry…” was all that he said.

“Passengers of AI 101- attention please. Your flight is ready to board” – I could hear the announcement.

“ Bye, Jitda, gotta go.”

“Tapashree, I am really sorry…did I spoil your mood?...hey give me your email id .”

… I had so many things to say, but ended up saying nothing- perhaps he won’t understand.

“Bye…” and I walked away. I wish my flight was not delayed.

At last I reached home…it’s a wonderful feeling to see the same streets, same shops, same evergreen Kolkata. But I don’t know why this Jitda episode was bothering me somehow…told my Baba the whole story.

Baba said “ Common, he said sorry to you.”

“So what?How could he, of all people, do this? I don’t mind losing Baba, but it should have been a fair game…we used to consider him as a perfect idol in our college.”

“Nobody is perfect dear, nobody ! Neither me, nor you- its for you to decide whether you want to overlook the imperfections or the perfections. Why don’t you give him a Benefit of Doubt ? May be you would have stood fourth anyways…I mean think about it…may be ! who knows !”

Well…Baba always has this unique style of explaining things…but wait…may be he is right…who knows what would have been the result if Jitda played the guitar perfectly…does this make a big difference?

Naaah ! forget it …moreover he confessed, he could have avoided the topic , but he did not…its ok I guess…things happen…but time heals .

Anyways…after few days I received a facebook request from Jitda…and I accepted J …

Anecdote ...

It was one of those gloomy Sunday mornings- I came out of my apartment- it was raining heavily and freezing cold. Like most unfortunate Biology graduate students I had to slog all weekends. Moreover I was a Plant Science major- I guess that explains a lot !!! Each set of plants took about two and a half months to grow and then I had to infiltrate a recombinant bacteria to see its effect in the plant. It was fantastically fascinating when my experiment worked (which was roughly one out of seven attempts) otherwise it was the same old story- repeat, repeat and repeat !

My department was located in one of the oldest buildings of the campus- exceptionally quiet specially on weekends. Ok, now I better stop cribbing about my ex-lab {:D}. To be honest there were certain things which I liked as well. My favorite place was my desk which had a huge glass window adjacent to it- I could see the sky and a small road which was mostly frequented by the cheerful and jovial undergrads (No wonder one can easily differentiate between a grad student and an undergrad !!! ) My lab-mates were pretty cool and we shared lab-protocols, Christmas gifts, candies, late-night coffees and not-to -forgetour mutual hateful thoughts (you can guess about whom, can’t you?)

Another thing which was part of my everyday life was my conversations with Jerry. He used to come to our lab everyday sharp at 8:50 am to collect our lab wastes- a nice old man who always had a smile on his face no matter how grey the day was!

“Hey Jerry , how are you? I asked.

He smiled and said “ I am doing great ! How about you?”

“I am good too.”

“Have you noticed it just started snowing? The first snow of the season. “

“Oh ! It did !” I looked outside the window taking a break from plasmid isolation. Yeah …he was right …I could see small white snowflakes gently touching the glass window and gradually melting away.

“Nice- I love the first snow” was Jerry’s spontaneous confession. Well, I should better not comment…I thought .

“So what are your plans for Thanksgiving Break ?“ Jerry asked again.

“Actually I have a seminar where I will be presenting after the break…so gotta prepare for that…how about you Jerry? “

“Me? Naaah ! I have few things to sort out…I will see you soon girl.”

“You have a good break” I said. He smiled, nodded and went away.

Well…my patience finally paid off. My experiments started working finally. Thanksgiving break was over and school reopened – we were all busy again with our normal work schedule. The temperature dropped drastically, the trees were bare, ground was covered with dried leaves…winter was setting in silently.

One fine morning as I was starting an experiment, I saw another lady picking up our lab wastes. I was a bit surprised. I casually asked “ Hey, where’s Jerry? I have n’t seen him in a while.”

She looked at me inquiringly and said “He is not doing well and so he has taken a leave”

“Really ! Is he infected the viral fever that’s in the air?”

“No dear…may be you don’t know- he is undergoing Chemotherapy.”

I remained quiet for a long time…silence was in the air again.

….You know what? This is life – unpredictable, nobody knows what’s going to happen tomorrow- still we plan, dream, predict, hope and what not. I was hopeful- I was pretty sure Jerry would come back in a day or two and with a smile on his face would ask me “Have you seen? Its beautiful outside !” …